When this bride sets boundaries for her sister, she asks the Internet:

“AITA, because I didn’t allow my sister to announce her pregnancy at my wedding?”

I (28, female) got married last weekend and it was supposed to be one of the happiest days of my life. My sister (31, female) and I have always had a close but competitive relationship. She tends to take things personally but I didn’t think she would do anything on my wedding day.

About a week before the wedding, Emily told me she was pregnant. I was so happy for her and congratulated her immediately. But then she asked if she could announce her pregnancy at my wedding reception.

She said it would be the perfect time because all our family and friends would be there and it would be a wonderful surprise for the wedding.

I told her that while I was happy for her, my wedding day was for me and my fiancé and I didn’t want her announcement to overshadow our celebration. She was upset and said I was being selfish and that this was a big moment for her too.

I suggested we announce it the next day when everyone was still there, but she insisted it wouldn’t be the same.

The day of the wedding came and I was nervous that she would try anyway. During her toast I could see her tears welling up and hinting at something big, so I quickly grabbed the microphone and thanked her for her kind words before she could continue. She was stunned and upset, but she sat down without saying anything more.

After the wedding, she confronted me and said I humiliated her in front of everyone. She said I ruined what could have been a happy day for both of us. My parents are also mad at me and say I could have handled it better and I should apologize for embarrassing them.

Now I doubt myself. AITA, because I didn’t allow my sister to announce her pregnancy at my wedding?

blue apple writes:

NTA – Her parents are biased. They embarrassed her because she was caught doing something she was specifically forbidden to do. A wedding reception is not a family reunion. It is a party thrown for two specific people.

Anyone who makes big announcements during this time misses out on honoring the couple on the one day that is all about them. It’s your sister who owes you an apology.

How do your parents want this apology to come from you? I am sorry that I firmly rejected your request to announce your pregnancy at my wedding and that you did not understand how serious I was.

I don’t know how else I could have said “no” to make it easier for you to understand. It’s my fault that I failed to say “no” in simple and clear language.

Also, I’m sorry you were embarrassed when I took the microphone away from you. That must have been humiliating for you, like a child being caught with his hand in the cookie jar. I know people hate being caught disobeying and I’m sorry that happened to you in front of an audience.

I should have had the foresight and not given you a chance to give a speech, knowing you would be weak and selfish. I did you a disservice by trusting that you could use your common sense for a day and setting you up for failure. Again, this is all my fault. I am so, so sorry.

daga7 writes:

NTA. You already said that she tends to be competitive and take things personally. I’m lucky not to have many family members or friends like that, but I’ve had contact with these types of people before and they are relentless.

My sister wouldn’t take no for an answer when she (thankfully) asked in advance. Involving her parents as flying monkeys was her way of making it about her anyway if her ambush failed. As a 31-year-old woman, I wouldn’t dream of upstaging my sister on her big day; especially when she told me not to.

Your sister is narcissistic for even getting upset/dragging this out. Your sister and her family owe you an apology for disrespecting YOU and almost embarrassing YOU. Your wedding, your day, your rules. I’m just surprised she didn’t want to wear white to your wedding too.

maineg writes:

NTA. Your sister is selfish and demanding and she should be ashamed of herself for TRYING to hijack your wedding to make it her own. Especially after you explicitly told her NO beforehand. If your sister is ashamed, she has only herself to blame. She owes you a HUGE apology!!

Also, your parents are AH for trying to enable and excuse this kind of disrespect on such an important day in your life. If I were you, I would be very LC with them all and enjoy your newlywed life without them until they are all ready to admit they are in the wrong and sincerely apologize to you.