Barret Kruse, 55, lives in Valencia with his two children. This transcript is based on an interview with Kruse and has been edited for clarity and length.

Kruse: How do I make it in LA? Not really, not really.

What am I doing for a living right now? I’m not doing anything for a living. That’s kind of the problem. I normally work in IT asset management, which is a fancy way of saying computers and software for companies and being able to maintain them. And in December, I think it was the 24th – just in time for the holidays – I was laid off and have been laid off ever since.

Right now, I’m doing gig jobs – Uber Eats, DoorDash – and delivering food. And I also have two kids with me, and one is older. They’re 18. The other is 14. I’m the primary guardian for my kids.

These unemployment checks come to about $840 every two weeks. Rent alone here is about $3,000, and that’s not including utilities and everything else.

The little money I had saved is gone.

Can I make it in LA? Oh man, I would love to. I came here from Chicago five, six years ago. It’s a beautiful place. I really love it, but I haven’t been able to really enjoy it. Since I came here, my life has been somewhere between financial terror and sheer panic for most of the time.

How do I talk to the kids about it? Usually in broad terms, in platitudes. I try to stay optimistic because I’m generally a pretty optimistic person. But they notice things and they notice your feelings and emotions.

Now my youngest is here, 14 years old, and he’s worried about whether I’m going to make it financially. You shouldn’t be worrying about that, man. He should be in school — you should be a kid. My oldest started college here pretty quickly. And they want a job, but they’re thinking about this added responsibility. And I see them on the same hamster wheel that I am — we just keep going, going, going, going, going, going, going, going. And you never stop. You never enjoy it. You never smell the roses or whatever. You never get to the Getty. You never get over to see the (Griffith) Observatory, you know? And then, damn, you’re 55. Time flies.

I would define “making it” as being able to feel safe for five minutes without having to worry about work. I’m not asking for big, grandiose things. I’m not getting a house over the hills there, (I want) just a little place that I can feel at home. I want to be able to… enjoy a sense of community because I can actually go out and meet people and see things and my neighbors aren’t strangers. Maybe put a few dollars aside, a car that works (and) four tires that fit — that’s what making it would be. I’m not asking for big things. I’m not asking for miracles, but it… feels that way now.

After more than six months of unemployment, Kruse landed a three-month temporary job in the IT sector in July. Unfortunately, he didn’t arrive in time to avoid being fired.

Related Articles: More Stories from KCRW Making It series