A prospective groom argues with his mother and father because they suggested that his fiancée wear the wedding dress of his father’s first wife, who died over 30 years ago.

In a now-viral post shared on Reddit, the groom-to-be says his father lost his first wife (who he refers to as “Mia” in the anonymous post) over three decades ago.

“It’s a very long and complicated situation, but to sum it up, my mom comes second in his heart because he has always said that Mia is the love of his life and he has always made that clear,” the man writes in the post.

The man’s father “even still wears his wedding ring with Mia in one hand,” he writes, adding that Mia is so much a part of the family that his mother “bakes a cake for her birthday.”

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“I was raised that way, with two mothers… Even though it wasn’t like that. It wasn’t a healthy childhood, but luckily I went to therapy to work on all the problems that caused,” the man adds.

The man writes that his fiancée, who is getting married, asked if she could wear his mother’s dress.

When he brought up the subject with his mother, she was initially “very excited” and even allowed his fiancée to try on her dress.

But a month later, his mother had another idea: his fiancée should wear Mia’s wedding dress instead.

“My fiancée told her no, she feels a connection to my mother and not to Mia, she doesn’t even know Mia,” the man writes.

Now his mother is trying to convince his fiancée to wear Mia’s dress “to remember her and so that she is there too, because she was someone very special.”

“Again, I have never met (Mia), I don’t know who she was. My fiancée told me that Mia is a complete stranger to her,” the man writes.

He adds that he told his mother that his fiancée would not wear Mia’s dress – “it even seems dark and weird to me, but I grew up with Mia’s memory and sometimes I don’t even know if I’m exaggerating or not.”

“Being raised this way sometimes confuses me about what is normal and what is not in a family. In my family dynamic, it would be normal to ask my fiancée to wear Mia’s dress, but I don’t know what someone raised normally would do and if I’m a bad person for not wanting it done,” the man adds in his post.

Many commenters on Reddit agree that the request to wear Mia’s dress is “creepy,” with one writing, “Why would your fiancée want to wear the dress of a woman that neither you nor she have any connection to? Nothing against your parents, but it’s a weird and creepy request and that your father wants you to have some sort of memorial service for his late wife at your wedding is weird.”

Others argued that the author’s parents’ behavior was “toxic and delusional.”

“I’m sure your mom isn’t happy, but the more her kids resist hearing about ‘daddy’s first love’ (it’s just inappropriate to talk about it so often that all the kids know about it), the more your mom may realize how much she was always just a substitute for the life your dad wanted,” another commenter wrote.